Following Tuesday’s games, New York has seen them all. The Mets dropped a doubleheader to the Braves, featuring Ryan Church’s attempt to break up a double play at second (Fail). Meanwhile, the Yankees lost to the Orioles in spectacular fashion, 12-2, with Alex Rodriguez hitting a garbage-time homer in his return and Derek Jeter getting plunked on the wrist. As a squat, leathery alien once said in a Spielberg film: “Ouch.” Unless you’re still basking in the afterglow of that Super Bowl victory, its a very bleak picture in New York right now; steel-reinforced shitstorm umbrellas are being feverishly mass produced there as we speak