If Favre was the exact same person and had played for MY team and not the goddamn Packers, I would of course adore him and forgive him all his foibles. But he doesn’t play for my team, so fuck him. Also, if I were to meet Favre in person, it’s a pretty strong likelihood I would NOT go up to him and say YOU FUCKING CUM-SLURPING COCK BURGLAR. That would be impolite. I’m sure he’s just a swell guy. Peter King tells me that every day.

So why do I hate his guts so much? Well, because I can. The reason we sports fans hate is because it’s the only acceptable place in the world TO hate. You can’t hate people of other races. That’s wrong. But you can sure as shit hate people of other teams. Sports allow us to hate without consequence, which is very cathartic. If we just went around liking everything, we’d all be miserable. Sports are a relatively safe receptacle for our bile and cruelty. We can toss our hate over there, then go about being respectable human beings elsewhere. It keeps us from REAL hate, which is destructive. We leave our hate “on the field” so to speak.

It’s not personal. To me, it’s just a role I play as a fan. Favre plays for my team’s rival. So it’s my JOB to hate every fiber of his fucking being. If I clapped for him, that would be gay. Only Cardinal fans do that.